The Dance

I was a little surprised.  He wasn’t even nervous.

I got the email announcement weeks ago.  I had to read and reread it just to convince myself that yes, my son was invited to such an event.

But why would he be nervous?  He has never been to one.  He has nothing in his life’s experiences that would have told him to go with hesitation or nervousness.

Of course, when eating dinner his littlest brother made silly remarks about him dancing with a girl and we all giggled.  JJ took it in good humor and smiled.

Khakis, a red shirt, and his favorite new blue coat.  That is what he choose.  (I did iron his pants.  Come on, I am his mother.)

Julian is at his first dance tonight for the 7th and 8th grade students at his school.

I did get teary upon him leaving.  And yes, I had to take a couple photos before he actually walked out the door.  Scott knew I wanted to be in one with him.

Julian is our oldest, the first to arrive.  This is our first dance, as parents.  I think it is big.  (Don’t we get some kind of extra points or something for actually getting here?)

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Life is short.  I feel the need to press myself to savor each breath a little more.  I am extremely thankful that our pre-teen is off at his school surrounded by kids his age, dancing, and loud music.  He is out there.  It is okay that my heart trembles at the age and stage our Julian is now.  In the wake of the recent events in December in Connecticut, I feel very lucky to have hugged our boy and sent him off.  This evening, I thought of those sweet little lives lost in the tragedy, and I thought about how they would never be able to be loved on by their parents again and sent to their first dance.  I feel the weight of that, and I am savoring… I promise I am savoring.

I felt like we were in a slow motion video as he was lacing his shoes, posing for the photos, and walking to the front door.  Am I crazy to think this was a huge moment?  I am understanding more and more why my mom got teary almost every time I left our home as a teenager.  I just thought she was over sensitive.  No, she was and is a parent.  A parent whose kid was going out into the world and was spreading her wings.

It is okay that he was most excited about the food.  It is okay that he insisted, “It is just a party.”

He is there.

Thank you, God, that he is there.

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3 thoughts on “The Dance

  1. Lesley Bulluck says:

    How exciting. you are certainly not making too big of a deal of it….I got teary just reading and thining about those days ahead. Julian, you do look super handsome. I like the haircut! Hope you had fun….and the food was good.

  2. Laurie says:

    I got teary eyed reading it too! And I will be calling you when that day happens around here. Proud of you for savoring and taking it all in! Love how y’all matched- ha and I LOVE his hair cut! Way to go JJ! Enjoy the party!

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